The day Mommy nearly loses her mind...

Yes Ladies & Gentleman, this Mommy is about to vent. This morning my kids made me cry...and not tears of joy. I can only remember this happening one other time and maybe once in the first few crazy weeks of their lives. But today, they got the best of me.

And here's the way it went

I bought one of my best friends a gift at the Coach store for her Birthday and the kids grabbed the bag down off the counter and pulled out the box. When I went to double check it, I realized the salesperson who beautifully wrapped it had accidently stuck something else I had been looking at in the box. How often do you get an extra something in your bag at the Coach store? Well, my conscience would not allow me to keep it for myself so this morning I decided to make a trip to the mall to return it and have a nice day out with the kids. I got up before the babes and jumped in the shower to get ready. Things were peaceful and quiet.

I get out of the shower 20 minutes later, and the hallway smells like a petting zoo.

My stomach immediately drops, not sure if it was from what I feared awaited me behind their bedroom door or the smell that was permeating in the hallway. I walked in to find my fear was reality. Poop EVERYWHERE. It doesn't take much poop smooshed into the carpet to make you feel that it is EVERYWHERE. And those little feet running around in circles and jumping on the bed will really multiply that feeling. Now, one thing I never like to do is greet my kids poorly first thing in the morning, but today my eyes went straight for the diaperless child and I was livid. Asjia chimes in with "Kaya big trouble, take off di-purrr". The kids are 2 1/2 and they know that this is a HUGE no no in our house! I looked around at the mess and just broke down and cried. I must add that I am not a crier. It takes a alot to get me there. The reaction from the kids was the same as I remember it being when I saw my own Mom cry...Uh oh, we finally pushed her over the limit This also marks the first day I have ever answered "what" to the kids instead of "yes" when they were calling my name(a big no no for me). Mason asks me while Im cleaning the poopy carpet where Daya was and I said "Daya's at work, lucky him". Mason repeats "lucky him". Ok I thought, time for me to check my attitude and make this yet another learning experience for them. I pulled the sympathy card... "look at this disgusting mess that Mommy has to clean up" "Can you smell this, isn't it disgusting?" "poor Mommy". They all chimed in, "oh Mama" "ewww, scusting" "dats nasty". Guess they got the point.

Perhaps someday I will look back and laugh at this. Not today, and probably not tomorrow either.

A five day old french fry, but no veggies

It's always a little bit scary when you see your child munching on something and you know you didn't give it to them.

Like when you go to buckle them in their carseat and you realize they are enjoying a piece of God knows what from God knows when...

Or when they dig up the missing sippy cup or bottle that you could never find and are drinking out of it.

And it's always lovely when they decide the food suddenly looks appetizing after it's been dropped and swept up into a nice dusty pile, eeeewwww.

I cringe at these situations and brace myself for an upset tummy, but it never happens! They must have some seriously strong immune systems. I can remember how paranoid I was about cleanliness when they were newborns. I remember nearly crying when my niece beat me to a pacifier that had fallen on the floor and stuck it back in my baby's mouth. Boy how things have changed.

They really are nuts...

So the boys are downright crazy. They seriously crack me up all day long. If being a Pro Wrestler was actually a respectable sport, we would have a very secure future for them. I would start grooming their natural abilities now. I think we will shoot for something like Football, or maybe even Rugby instead. I can only imagine how life will be in 5 years time. Poor Asjia, she is always caught in the crossfire. She is going to be a tough little cookie. Nothing phases her these days, much like myself. Here are pictures of Exhibits A-I

Here is Asjia looking at them like they are nuts. She knows the deal.

The match moves to the sofa and the nudging turns to wrestling.

Kyle tries to pull mason up by his diaper, sofa cushions come flying off.

*I would have usually stepped in at this point, but photo journalism was my intention here

Kyle takes a breather, so Mason uses his lower body(backwards mind you) to trap him and pull him back in.

Back on to the sofa. Asjia gets trampled and thinks its funny for a fraction of a second.

Asjia fighting them off.

One down, one to go. "NO, NO!"

Mommy calls a timeout. Mason gives sister a kiss to show he is committed.

And we all made it out alive...

2 year olds are not to be trusted

My kids came close to the auction block today. After weeks with no poop parties, I decides they were ready to be trusted without onesies. Ha...Did that ever backfire (no pund intended)! In just a couple of short minutes diapers were ditched and my living room turned in to what looked & smelled more like a petting zoo. Have you ever looked at a mess and just wanted to walk away from it and hope it would clean itself up? The thought of setting them on the front porch with a "for sale as is" sign actually crossed my mind, but only for a quick second. Can I say, THANK GOODNESS FOR MY LITTLE GREEN MACHINE:)