The day Mommy gets her heartbroken, oh bittersweetness...

Of course the first place I run is to my computer to blog about it. I know you guys understand, that's why.

This morning was the "fiwst day go skoo", yes, first day of school. Last night the kids were jumping around like wild animals with excitement over "going skooo morrow" so naturally I thought it was going to go off without a hitch. This morning they were so excited, helping me get all six shoes and socks gathered up. We pulled out our new doggie "packpacks" and headed for the door, only running an hour behind schedule...not bad right? Luckily today is only our first test run. The excitement carried through our 5 minute trip through the neighborhood and I explained that they were going to play, and read, and sing, and dance, and eat nummies, and make friends, yadda yadda yadda. They all jumped out and ran up to the building and even walked calmly with Mommy to the classroom. Once we hung up our backpacks that I had to pry off of them, the panic button went off. Mason first, then the others. The teacher invited them to circle time and they looked at her like she was crazy. Mommy was asked to scoot out quickly, so I did. Three minutes later, my children could be heard well over a few blocks away I am sure. Wailing, all three of them. "MAMA". My first instinct flew me back around and started towards the classroom, "Mrs. J don't do it...it's going to be ok". Ok, no problem, go ahead and tear my heart out no biggie. They assured me this was normal and that they would eventually all calm down. I hung around in tears for the next 30 minutes just listening. Asjia never really stopped, the boys decided it wasn't so bad and just backed into a corner together to observe. My sister in law happens to be the director of the school, so that makes me feel a tad bit better. She promised me she would make her presence known to them throughout the day and remind them that Mommy would be back soon. I drove home very reluctantly, walked through the door in to a quiet house, and broke down like a big baby. What have I done? I can't even do my dishes in peace and quiet thinking that my baby's are being traumatized. Oh, this is painful, lemme tell ya. Hopefully all the teachers are right, hopefully I will go back for them and they will be all perked up and having a ball. Every parent I have talked to say it's the best thing they could have done for their children, lets hope they were right! I will keep you posted.