Rest in Peace my dear friend...

I am so shocked and devastated over the death of one of our close friends. Courtney was one of a kind, he was sure to light up a room and make you laugh.

It was just a few weeks ago that we caught up with each other and planned to get the family together and hang out. Unfortunately, I did not call soon enough. It is so hard for me to wrap my mind around this. How could it be? I had skimmed over the forwarded mail he sent me in my inbox several times not knowing that he would be gone from this earth the next day.

Death is one thing I am not prepared to handle. As a Christian, death should not be so hard to grasp. But I admit that I am extraordinarily attached to the physical.

I pray that the Lord gives Susan, his dear wife to be and their two beautiful children Blake and Raigen peace in their hearts. I pray for her strength to go on with two babies counting on her. I pray that their little minds are not to confused and that they have little angels assigned to them to give them extra peace and comfort.

Courtney was killed in the line of duty. He was a Maryland police officer and was a victim of a hit and run accident while laying cones to re-route traffic. The woman who hit him was later found and arrested on a previous charge of failure to appear in court for a DUI. They found empty alcohol containers in the back seat as well as alcohol on her breath. So tragic, so senseless.

It is such a painful reminder of how I take my own life for granted. How I take for granted that my loved ones will always be here.

I am paralyzed with sadness. Is it really too late for me to say goodbye? If I shout loud enough that I loved him and cherished his friendship will he hear me? Did he know? What can I do to give any little piece of him back to his young children that will never get to know him? At 2 and 4 how much will they remember? ughhh, I can't get over it. Truly my wish is to honor his legacy and celebrate his life, but forgive me for my emotional out pour. It is all just so fresh and shocking. I can only hope that Courtney is looking down and knows that he will forever be loved, that his friendship was cherished, and that he will not be forgotten. I will miss you dearly.