Saturday, July 21, 2007

What did I tell you about those Mommy Instincts?

I strongly believe we were given this crazy thing called Mommy Instincts as a parting gift from childless days.

Last night I was getting ready to tuck in as usual, after my nightly ritual of locking up, setting the alarm, and checking the kids. I turned on the monitor in my room and got this overwhelming feeling of nervousness. I looked around in the darkness and made my way to the bed. I was scolding myself in my head for being so paranoid & silly. I had just walked up from downstairs after securing the place like a Federal Penitentiary myself. What was worrying me? During prayer, I could not shake the feeling and at one point was afraid of waking my Husband because I was praying out loud, intentionally. After tossing and turning, I finally fell asleep about a half hour later(1:45am'ish).

At 5am my Husband wakes me out of my dead sleep with, "is that our alarm?", and yes, it was. Our Home security alarm that is. I cannot explain to you the feeling of panic that came over me. It's still dark outside, we are half dressed and disoriented, and there is no way the alarm was set off by either of us. Or the triplets. I leaped out of bed and ran to their door. I didn't want to go and give them that same feeling of panic so I stood and waited. ADT called and Chris went down to check all of the doors. Nothing. Nothing, except for that for the first time in HISTORY I had forgotten to lock the deadbolt on our front door...which was where ADT claimed the alarm had been set off. Because we have only had our alarm go off randomly one time, during a heavy wind storm, we opted to have the police come out and take a look. They found no signs of the door being pryed open, but looked around the entire property and made their presence known before leaving. If there would have been a caption above my head it would have read, "Please stay, OH PLEASE, OH PLEASE, OH PLEASE". Luckily, the sun started to come up about a half hour later.

Having a child(or three) really changes your frame of mind in this type of situation. It's no longer a thought of mine to run and hide and grab a sharp knife on the way. It makes me obsess over how I would keep my babies safe if in fact there was an intruder. How would I hide three small children, or keep them quiet, or safe? What is the best plan of action when you are awoken from a dead sleep and faced with this sort of circumstance? There is such a feeling of vulnerability. I am not just thinking of myself anymore & the new dynamics are quite complicated.

Now as I remember, just about every time I have needed to be on guard, my sense of awareness tunes right in and my personal alarms start going off long before. Something is suddenly off. I have an unsettled feeling that doesn't go away. This has happened to me just about every time an emergency type of situation has occurred. I am calling it Instinct.

Did someone open the door and make a run for it at the first sound of our screeching alarm? Was it a total fluke? Or was it God's way of reminding me of something? Like the importance of locking my door and setting my alarm, or being more aware of my surroundings. Either way, my instincts have proven to be strong once again. It was either a potentially very bad situation or a hand delivered message from he who has much more control over our security than I do...


triplet mama said...

How scary. I hope it was just your instincts reminding you to be more careful etc and not someone trying to break in. Luckily, we have never had anything like that happen in real life, but I have imagined things like that in my mind, wondering what I would do and how I react. I totally agree that your mindset changes once you have kids.

Undomestic Goddess said...

I pray it was just a reminder that you should double check all the doors. Please be careful and keep your outside lights on if and if they aren't btight enough put in a bigger bulb up stairs and down do you hear me do it now and don't wait! this way someone will look elsewhere since your house is all lit up! AAHH I am shaking now please be careful

hi my name is mommy said...

It does change as so many things do. You can never be too careful, but we are going to be just fine:)

Psalm 91:1
He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High
will abide in the shadow of the Almighty.
I will say to the Lord, “My refuge and my fortress,
my God, in whom I trust.”

For he will deliver you from the snare of the fowler
and from the deadly pestilence.
He will cover you with his pinions,
and under his wings you will find refuge;
his faithfulness is a shield and buckler.
You will not fear the terror of the night,
nor the arrow that flies by day,
nor the pestilence that stalks in darkness,
nor the destruction that wastes at noonday.

A thousand may fall at your side,
ten thousand at your right hand,
but it will not come near you.
You will only look with your eyes
and see the recompense of the wicked.

Because you have made the Lord your dwelling place—
the Most High, who is my refuge
no evil shall be allowed to befall you,
no plague come near your tent.

For he will command his angels concerning you
to guard you in all your ways.
On their hands they will bear you up,
lest you strike your foot against a stone.
You will tread on the lion and the adder;
the young lion and the serpent you will trample underfoot.

“Because he holds fast to me in love, I will deliver him;
I will protect him, because he knows my name.
When he calls to me, I will answer him;
I will be with him in trouble;
I will rescue him and honor him.
With long life I will satisfy him
and show him my salvation.”